A Mama Bear's Manifesto

Love, Autism, & Political Cruelty: An Open Poem | No. 021

The Beartooth Pass near Red Lodge, Montana. At 10,947 feet up, visiting this place makes you feel small. To the politician I’m about to address: I hope you go sometime.

To: God

will you

play with me?

Yes or no

Frum

jaxsin

My autistic nine-year-old son wrote this on the church whiteboard this week.

Also, this week, Someone Powerful in Government said, amongst other horrendous and inaccurate things, “Autism destroys families.” I don’t want to give his name any more mentions, but I’ve included a source - if you need to know.

Autism may destroy some things. In some ways, parenting a child with autism has upended my life. However, I think Mr. Politician-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named would be surprised to hear the things autism really destroys.

Because it damn well doesn’t destroy what he thinks it does. My son didn’t destroy our family; he is, truly, the glue that makes our family whole a lot of days. And the message my son wrote on the whiteboard, that’s his heart - his inclusive, curious, loving, innocent, and accepting heart. I hope the love in hearts like his destroys the hate in hearts like yours, Mr. Politician. But until that happens, here is what I have to say:

What Autism Destroys: An Open Poem

Autism destroys the idea that only certain kinds of lives are valuable.

Autism destroys the misperception that only one kind of life is worth fighting for.

Autism destroys the lie that human differences are something to eradicate, fix, and erase.

Autism destroys the notion that life ends where diagnoses begin.

Autism destroys the golden pedestal upon which efficiency and productivity reside.

Autism destroys the myth that conventionality and typicality are the ultimate values to strive for.

Autism destroys the boxes that attempt to confine and restrict creativity, love, and inclusion.

So, Mr. Politician, we’ve clarified what autism destroys.

Now, I have one question for you:

Don’t we all sometimes reach out to God,

or the universe,

or literally anything at all -

and write a message,

or curl a note into a bottle,

and hurl it into the tumultuous sea,

and hope to find something bigger,

something better, than all of this?

Don’t we all hope we can give what we have

and get love

acceptance

inclusion

and

respect

in return?

Don’t we all just walk through the world

and do the best we can -

And hope it’s enough?

I bet, Mr. Politician, once in a while

you even feel like this, too.

Someone unlike you is not a problem

to be solved.

There are problems aplenty for you to solve, yes -

but who my son is,

now, Mr. Politician, that’s not one over which to stress.

Dare I say, the problem to be destroyed

is the hate

inside you.

If you think autism would destroy you so,

then you’re not half as strong

as the families I know.

If you showed up at our door,

my son would invite you in to play.

He would get you snacks and toys,

and ask you your name.

I wish you knew a love like his,

because, sir -

if you did,

everything would be different for you.

all that would be destroyed

would be the hate in your heart -

go ahead and add that to your fact list as true.

and if you were so lucky, you’d know a love that isn’t based

on power

on status

on wealth

on greed -

just grace.

If you knew a love like my son’s

you’d know the kind of love we all need.

So when my son writes the words to God,

will you play with me?

I sit still, breathe in, and

know deep, deep, deep down in my soul

that it is well

because

while men like you

may stand behind the mic, preaching hell

never listening but only grabbing to be heard,

I know one thing -

you will never

ever

have the last word.

---

April is World Autism Awareness Month (and National Poetry Month!) In an effort to increase accessibility in my own publication, I have added voiceover recordings to all of my posts. The voiceover is an audio recording of me reading the post, so it doesn’t contain any content different from the written post. The point is to give readers another option, and primarily, to increase accessibility.

I always love hearing from real people reading these real posts (bots, AI, and trolls, stay away! - and ableists - you stay away too, please.) Good real people of the world, thanks for being here.

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